One day she woke up and realized she wasn’t hurting as much as before. The wound was still there, but the pain duller, more of an ache that intensified at certain times. Like first thing in the morning. She would open her eyes, and the wound was there, dismantling her peace, trying it’s best to swallow her while she was still sleepy and vulnerable.
She let the wave flood her. Watched the mental dam break.
Then got up and made a coffee.
The same thing would happen as she lay down to sleep at night, eyes wide open in the dark, listening to the washing machine rumbling in the other room, waiting for the sleeping aid she took an hour ago to kick in….there it was again. That ache, that caught her off guard in the silence. It waited until she was alone, and vulnerable once more. Until her mind ran in twisted, mental loops. Overwhelmed with memories.
She rides the wave again.
It is entirely possible the ache will always be there. Perhaps it’s true what they say about heartbreak and scars. Maybe it’ll always hurt just a little. But then again, maybe it won’t.
She knows deep down it won’t hurt forever and here’s why.
The periods in between the waves of sadness are getting longer and longer. She imagines she is on a boat sailing away from the shore where all the memories, love, and sadness are. A burning wreckage is left behind. Each day, she drifts further and further away from the shore. Sometimes a profound urge rises and she considers jumping out of the boat and swimming, against the current, back to the shore. Then from her little boat, she notices the black smoke rising from the mess left behind, and knows she must keep drifting on.
Drifting….drifting…she looks back every now and then at the wreckage, which gets smaller and smaller, and then one day she smiles. She can no longer see the thick black smoke, high as the clouds.
The ashes can rest.
Photo by Mourad Saadi on Unsplash
© 2017-2020 Candy Lebby All Rights Reserved
Beautiful and such deep and profound way it is written, Candy. Great.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thank you for stopping by and leaving a lovely comment. Have a great week 🙂😘
LikeLiked by 2 people
Welcome dear Candy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yery nice
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks Bill. Hope youve been well and have a great week 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! Always so nice to read your work! Hope you have a great week as well!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you that makes me smile 😊. I will make sure I have a great week! We all will.
LikeLike
😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
O yea. I know that feeling well. Perfectly captured.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yup.. and thank you Powers… had to get this one out there. 😊
LikeLiked by 2 people
Wow!!! That is an awesome read and a perfect example and look into the mind of moving on!❤️. I absolutely loved that, that was pure poetry in motion from the moment I stepped on the boat with her!❤️. The image, memories and the past all being left behind only to make her stronger, that was beautiful!🌹. You gorgeous soul, that was one of my favorites by far!!🌹❤️
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aww well thank you so much, you are a lovely soul yourself and I appreciate your kind words❤😊
Thank you for stopping by once again.
And keep writing because I love and enjoy your work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ditto, same to you gorgeous.❤️❤️. And you’re so welcome, keep up the great work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Will do! 😄❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤️🌹😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is such a wonderful writeup
LikeLiked by 2 people
You are very sweet, thank you😊❤ hope you’re having a great start to the week wherever you are!
LikeLike
I am …thank u💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wonderful ❤😊
LikeLike
Beautiful poetical metaphorical description of how one leaves heartbreak and sad memories behind.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks Chris, always enjoy your work and you stopping by my blog ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome, Candy. ❤️
Always enjoy 😊 reading your blog.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yay 😊, glad you do. I’ve been missing your haikus! Inspiring me to do a few haha.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’d love to read your haikus. 💖💗💞
LikeLiked by 1 person
Then I’d love to write them 😄❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! I love all your work but for some reason this one speaks to me the most! I love how you captured her mind & her surrounding. Great, great job, babe! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! Missed seeing you around. God I love this place ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Stunning. Perfectly crafted piece. 🔥🔥🔥
LikeLiked by 1 person
Why thank you🙂! I love your work too, you write such beautiful pieces. Keep it up 🙌❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Amazing… Can totally relate. Also loved the boat analogy. Analogies always make things seem better, a bit less painful, less scary.. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Evana, for visiting, reading and leaving a lovely comment. 🙂❤
You’re right. It feels like a story in which you are crafting the least painful ending, one with hope but not for that which has passed but for our own journey into the future with more self-love, courage and confidence.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You captured something raw here, perfect.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much! For stopping by and reading. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is beautiful!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Sharon! And I really appreciate you visiting my page 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on Mitch Teemley and commented:
My Featured Blogger this week is Candy Lebby of Fantastical Murmurs. Candy doesn’t post often, but when she does her poetry and prose are always worth your time. Her words are probing, compelling, real. By her own description, she is an author “who reads voraciously and writes about various dark things.” She does indeed. And yet there is always a glimmer of hope, always a sense that the journey is worth it. And indeed it is.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow Mitch! I’m speechless. Thank you so much for your kind words. Seriously, you made my week.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The honor is mine, Candy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! Beautifully moving. I am really grateful that Mitch Teemley introduced you to me. Blessings!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hey, thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment! Hope you’ll stick around. Mitch is awesome.
LikeLike
Nicely done, Candy 🙂 Lovely imagery to capture a very real journey from grief, through grief, and into healing, even peace.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hey Dora, thank you for reading and leaving a thoughtful comment. The poem is a real journey through the motions (literally and figuratively) with healing and peace being the destination. Thanks again.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My pleasure entirely, Candy 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! This is beautiful, there are layers of depth and meaning. It felt like you painted a picture of my life with your words. Thanks for sharing it with us. Blessings!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for visiting and reading my poem! Really appreciate the love. Hope you’ll stick around 💜
LikeLiked by 1 person